Friday, October 31, 2008


The time has come once again for one and all to go under disguise and become something else for an entire night. Children will dress up as their favorite super hero, tv star, monster, or profession. And the parent's will un-lovingly take them out trick or treating. 

What happened to the magic of Halloween? When we as children got dressed up, put on our make-up, and went out to see who could get the most candy? Now we find ourselves competing to be the "sluttyest" bumble bee, or nurse, or doctor, or even a slutty "construction worker". I mean really, what's the point?

Take a look around you today, you don't need halloween to be these things. As I was driving home from work last night, watching all the girls in their Scantily clad costumes walk to the parties, I realized that this is no longer "dressing up" it's definitely dressing down.

While some people go out and spend big money on these Barely costumes, others just take some underwear from their closet, throw in a pair of ears and a tail and claim to be the animal of their choice. Seriously? What happened to being a little kid, going out and buying a sweat suit, drawing whiskers on, ears and a tail and really being an animal?

Halloween turns the most conservative girls into something you would never understand. It questions morals, decisions, and ethics. 

YOu may be thinking "oh shut up" but I know. I was a "slutty" soldier last year, and I just realized, why? Who am I trying to impress? Do I really want the love of my life to say they met me while i was dressed as a "slutty soldier"? NO, so this year, I'm a fairy. NO, I'm not a slutty fairy, my dress covers well passed my butt cheeks, my make up will be like tinker bell, and I will feel good about myself the next day.

I will walk home tonight having had the best night ever. Fun with my friends, a dance party, and costume contest. A caramel apple bar, scary movies, and true fun. I will return home sober, remembering every aspect of my night, and having no regrets. 

I respect myself too much to become one of these girls. I, tonight will travel back in time, to my childhood, putting the magic back in Halloween.

Happy Halloween!

Monday, October 27, 2008

My dreams are your future...

Have you ever really thought about what other peoples dreams are? Do they want to be a doctor, or a pilot, or a teacher? I guess I never really thought any of this was important, until today when I really got to thinking about it. Other peoples dreams, are my future, and my dreams are your future. 

Lets say Sarah Palin's dreams come true, and she becomes Vice President of the United States... possibly even the President... quite a scary future. Or say the kid sitting next to me in class has a dream to run the country... again mine and your future.. kinda crazy huh?

So if this is the case, why is it that all the schools are taking kids dreams away? Don't they realize that these are the people who hold your future in their hands? If colleges keep denyng kids their majors, or even admission into the school, those kids lose their dreams, and parts of our lives may be missing. It's just kind of a crazy thing to think about.

So the next time you see somebody reaching for their dreams, encourage them. Don't tell them they are out of reach, tell them to reach further, and try harder. Their dreams are our future. 

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Somedays are better than others

So today was a downer. I woke up and felt absolutely horrible! I didn't think anything of it, just thought that I was more tired than usual.... but oh no. After my math class I rushed to the bathroom and got sick! YUCK!

I went to the rest of my classes, and then came back to my room to sleep for 2 hours. It was an amazing nap, but I woke up to the sound of my phone ringing... It was work. They need me tonight, and I have this problem saying no. SO of course, I'm going into work tonight with the worst Migraine I've had in awhile.... what a life.

However, I'm lucky to have a warm bed to sleep in, and a job that gets me money! OH well, I have a big thing to look forward to this weekend..... my family!!

Friday, October 17, 2008

There's no place like home

Today, I drove home to see my mom and plan on going to a football game tonight. I was leaving school, and realizing that no matter how long it's been since I've been home, the same excitement is there.

So I miss my family. There is nothing like coming home to a warm house, with warm loving people. In most cases, this is usually someones real home, however, mine is the North Greene Middle school. Strange, I know. But I grew up here. This is where I spent 80% of my childhood, and where I made tons of memories. Every teacher here helped me grow into who I am today.

When I walked through those doors today, it was like stepping foot into my front door. The teachers greeted me with the same warm smiles, and the new teachers, immediately knew who i was. The older teachers asked me how school was, and even pulled a parental move by saying "Why aren't you in school young lady?" Ah how lucky I am.

This doesn't mean however, that I don't have a real home. HOme isn't where you live, it's where you love. MY home is in Jacksonville, Roodhouse, Greenfield, Normal, and Texas. I feel completely greatfull to have so many homes, and so many loves. God truly blessed my life, and I can't thank him enough.

There is no place like home. Wherever that is, nowhere can compare to the love and warmth you feel when you are there. The excitement of seeing the people and places you love is a gift nobody can take away from you.

I love home.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Ten on Tuesday

1. It's homecoming, which means everything at ISU is decorated and the team spirit is high!

2. I'm tired

3. I just woke up from a nap!

4. I get to participate in homecoming games tonight, and I'm actually really excited about it...

5. I love Paula Dean. I mean seriously, her southern accent, her wonderful food, and I'm pretty sure she is drunk when she records her shows!

6. I have to eat dinner early, and I"m really not that hungry.

7. I have an exam on Thursday, and I think it'll be at the easier end of the spectrum.

8. I'm knitting a scarf for a homeless shelter. While I know it's for a good cause, it doesn't make it any less tedious! 

9. I love the movie Hocus Pocus!

10. I love Halloween, and I Can't wait to dress up and watch scary movies with my besties!

Monday, October 13, 2008

Oh the life we live..

This weekend was a crazy one my friends. It all started on Thursday when I found out at work that I had to work everyday of the weekend. So Friday night, I went to work from 5 to 9:30, and managed to come back to my dorm, to find all of my friends rearing and ready to go out. I felt horribly tired, and just couldn't bring myself to go out with them. Instead I stayed in, watched the movie "Knocked Up" and fell asleep. 

Saturday was even more interesting. I woke up, knowing what the day ahead of me entailed, and immediately wanted to go back to bed. I got to hang out with my girls during the day, but had to go to work again from 5 to 9. It was then that my crazy night began. At work, I got to see 2 sets of 40 year old boobs, 3 screaming children, and 4 credit card sales. After I got off work, I had to do service work for my Fraternity. We decided to be ISU's designated driver service for the evening. HOLY CRAP! That is about all I have to say. 12 drunk men, 6 drunk girls, and 1 whom i don't know the sex of later... it was 3 am. I WAS EXHAUSTED! I returned to my dorm after this falling asleep finally at about 3:30am.

Sunday I woke up at 8am. It was time to work the childrens carnival. Again, doing service for APO, but this I was really looking forward to. I got to drive some less fortunate people to the carnival and back, experiencing what it was like to be them. I worked the carnival from 10 to 2:30 and had to leave to go to real work. It was there that it all finally caught up to me. I had to work from 3 to 6:30 and by the time I was off work.. my entire body was aching. 

I got home from work on sunday night, watched desperate housewives and found myself asleep by 9:30.

What a weekend huh? What I got from this weekend was how fortunate we all are in life. Having people we love around us, activities to participate in, and a roof over our heads. I find myself wondering how it is that I find so much to complain about? The people I gave rides to were so thankful, for something I was quite honestly dreading. It really opened my eyes to what life is all about. 

Life isn't about how much money you have, what purses you have on your arms, what clothes you wear, or what you drive. Life is about how much love you have in your life. Look around yourself and realize how lucky you are to have what you have. I forget how lucky I am just to be able to walk down the stairs, and grab something to eat, reach in the fridge and grab something to drink, and yet I still complain that "there is nothing to eat". Perhaps we have forgotten just how much we have. 

The next time you drive to work, or pass someone on the sidewalk, remember how lucky you are to have what you have. Remember all the people in your life who love you, and remember that in life, there truly isn't anything we should be complaining about...

I love you all and thank God everyday for you. Kisses and hugs!

Thursday, October 9, 2008


OK, so I decided that after hearing about my paper, you all deserved a copy of the final copy! So here it is! I"m posting it!

Faith in the Victorian Period
What is faith? Is it believing in something you can’t see, or just having faith in something you truly believe in? In the case of the Victorian period, faith was simply having a belief in something. Whether it was belief in God, people, science, or love, faith was having a belief. Faith during the Victorian Period was extremely important. With death rates sky- rocketing, poverty rising, and living conditions sinking, it was crucial to have a faith in something to keep your life going with purpose. However, due to the scientific discoveries made by people such as Charles Darwin, and other scientists, faith started to be tested. People started wondering how accurate the church actually was, if the church was even legitimate, and what it was they could actually have faith in. What would the culture allow them to have faith in? The question became: Do I have faith in God, faith in love, faith in science or faith in people?
Faith in God seems to be the most obvious form of faith. During the Victorian period, the Bible was one of the most popular books read and taught among all people (in class notes). It makes perfect sense that most Victorian’s had faith in God. However, when Charles Darwin proposed the idea of evolution, this type of faith started to be questioned. It became a question of who God was, how he did what he did, and did he exist? Alfred, Lord Tennyson was one of the most popular writers of this time. Perhaps he understood clearly what faith in God truly meant. Or perhaps this piece is his way of discovering who he truly was in his faith. He makes it clear in his piece “In Memoriam A. H. H.” just what it is that he is questioning. He begins by saying “Strong son of God, immortal Love…” proving that he at least has some faith or at least acknowledges God (1261). However, in this piece he goes on to ask questions and approach a Godly faith in a way that can bring a mere person to tears. While during this time period, things were being tested, and people were losing their way, he was discovering what it was that he himself wanted out of this faith. It is clear that he is not firm in his beliefs and at this time, I’m not sure that anyone was. Right before he had written this piece, he had lost his best friend, thus testing his faith even more. But he goes on through his entire piece speaking to God and asking his forgiveness. He points out how important it is to have faith in God so that you can deal with things such as death. At this point in the Victorian period, death was everywhere (in-class notes). Throughout the entire piece he points out in different ways why you should have faith. One of the most famous parts about this piece is the fact that he refers nature to God.
“When on my bed the moonlight falls,
I know that in thy place of rest
By that broad water of the west,
There comes a glory on the walls: …” (1276).

Tennyson has a way of connecting nature to God and speaking of his place of rest. While many may see this as his place of sleeping, it is clearly where his body will rest after death. It is important to understand that Victorian’s also believed that there was more after life. Tennyson also points this out in his poem when he talks about his friend who has just passed away. Faith in God, yes, but during this time it was becoming harder and harder to continue this faith without having enormous doubts. Tennyson proves that it is possible to keep your faith in God, even when science is telling you it may not be likely.
At this time, when people were losing their faith in God, they started turning to having faith in love. Whether this faith in love had to do with family, a significant other, or just love of a friend, it did not matter. People started to believe that love could overcome all obstacles. It was thought that if you lost everything in your life, but kept the ones you loved, life would still be ok. It is quite obvious in Tennyson’s piece “In Memoriam A. H. H.” that he has complete faith in love. While he has just lost a huge love of his, his best friend and his sister’s lover, he still remains faithful (1260). Throughout this piece Tennyson struggles with his faith, and at the end he finds the love of his life, along with finding his faith. It proves that throughout the hard times, as long as you have love, you can survive. Faith in love was also stressed in family situations. Having a loving family was very important to the Victorians. However, it is stressed most in Tennyson’s piece.
With faith that comes of self-control,
The truths that never can be proved
Until we close with all we loved,
And all we flow from, soul in soul. (1290).
It is obvious in this stanza that love and faith go hand in hand. He has faith in love, and without love his faith will not be fulfilled.
Faith in science may not be something people think of when someone says “faith”. However, with the new discoveries, people started realizing just what science could do. It was at this time during the Victorian period that Charles Darwin discovered the idea of Evolution. This shook the entire culture and beliefs of the Victorians. Tennyson also approaches this topic in “In Memoriam A. H. H.” It wasn’t about the fact of what science was proving, it was about what science could do. Thus far in the Victorian period, science had already brought them the Industrial Revolution. While this was not necessarily the greatest for the people of the time, they had faith that it would eventually do good things for all the people. Alfred, Lord Tennyson however, approaches it in a different way saying:
To shape and use, Arise and fly
The reeling Faun, the sensual feast;
Move upward, working out the beast,
And let the ape and tiger die. (1288).

It is clear that he is accepting Evolution in this passage. It is not quite clear what his opinion is in this passage, but the acceptance of it is clear. He goes on to say how this new revolution has tested his faith in God and how he is not sure how to handle it. The culture of the Victorian’s was to have faith in God, but faith in science was definitely making its way into the lives and minds of the people.
While science was making it’s way into the faith world, people were still turning to other people for faith and hope. During the industrial revolution, living situations were harsh. People were relying on and looking to other people to give them hope, and a reason to live. While children were still working in the factories, many families relied on fellow feeling. They relied on other people giving them a helping hand and lifting them back up. This however, seemed unreasonable and unimaginable to some people. Tennyson again counteracts this assumption in his piece. He talks about the hope of people and what they can do for you. Whether they just make you happy, or whether they help you financially, that people can help. For instance, it is obvious in this piece that Tennyson had tons of faith in his best friend. He speaks of the happiness he brought him, and the sadness that is upon him after his death.
Forgive my grief for one removed,
Thy creature, whom I found so fair.
I trust he lives in thee, and there
I find him worthier to be loved. (1262)
It makes it quite obvious that Tennyson looked up to him and found lots of strengths in him also. It is not quite clear whether this is a good thing or a bad thing. If we have faith in a certain person, and that person passes away, do we lose faith? Or is it faith in people in general that Tennyson means by his passages? It is not only Tennyson who finds faith in people. It has been said in previous Victorian pieces that the fate of the world lies in the hands of children (in-class notes). If this is true, then faith in people is a necessity. It was a must to believe that people could change the world at this time. With so many deaths, so much poverty, and so much cruelty going on, people had to make the change happen. Perhaps faith in people was the most legitimate form of faith.
Again I ask, what is faith? Does it change when someone questions it? When someone dies? When science makes a break through? Is there even an answer to this question? In Tennyson’s eyes, there are many definitions of faith. He even explores the different possibilities of faith. The Victorian’s had faith in lots of things, and also doubted their faith in these things too. The Victorian’s lived in a time of love, loss, heart- ache, and sorrow. Without a faith, it was hard to live and think your life had a purpose at all. With new discoveries, industrialization, human doubt, and death surrounding, faith was crucial to survival. The question should not have been: “What is faith?” it should rather have been “Do you have it?” Tennyson believed that faith was the key to survival and true happiness. Tennyson pointed out that believing in science, God, love, or people was not what was important. What was important was that you believed (1290)

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Ten on Tuesday!

This is my first ten on Tuesday! I hope you all enjoy!

1. Tonight Elie Wiesle is coming to ISU. He's the Holocaust survivor who wrote the book Night. I'm going to watch him speak!

2. I'm vice president of Service for the fraternity I'm pledging. APO it's the one James was in.

3. I'm still working on my paper

4. I talked to my teacher today about my paper and she said it was impressive

5. I hate missing Law and Order SVU

6. I can't wait for Grey's Anatomy on Thursday

7. T.V. kinda controls my life

8. I miss my family like crazy...

9. Everyone is pregnant... Becky, The people i babysit for, and a friend... STOP THE NASTY!

10. LIfe is good.... I just love life right now, even though I do have to write a paper!

Monday, October 6, 2008

Our adventures!

All of these were quite entertaining... I love these girls and we had a great time!

Gotta love college

So you just have to love college and what it does to you. As most of you know, this is my first blog! Due to procrastination on my part, the blog world has just gained a new member. 

You see I have this paper that I'm supposed to be writing. It's by far the hardest assignment I have ever had in my life. Just so you can get a grasp on the difficulty of it, my mother, the jr.high principal, doesn't even understand it! OK I GET THE HINT!! I'm the english major here, but I just can't do it! I plan on talking to my teacher about it tomorrow... even though the paper is due on Thursday! 

What now? Well I had  two exams today. Math and Educational Psychology! Well, they both went pretty well, but probably could have been better. I guess I learned my lesson, don't fool around all weekend and expect to magically know the material come monday! 

So what about my weekend? Well on Friday my friends Rebecca, Claire, and Alyssa ventured down to the oh so huge metropolis of Jacksonville! We actually spent most of our time in Greenfield. Saturday morning we participated in the 16th annual Greenfield Public Library Chili Cookoff! IT was pretty hillarious and they had a good time. 

So for my first blog, I think I've done a pretty good job! I hope you all enjoy what is to come and I will be updating REGULARLY! 

Love to all-